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Snow (at Vejlbykollegiet)

Sun, 09 Dec 2012 13:44:05 +0100

Snow (at Vejlbykollegiet)

Priorities

Mon, 25 Jun 2012 01:42:34 +0200

Watching Sex and the City always gets me in ‘guy-mode’.

‘Guy-mode’ is what this tumblr mostly represents: awkward, insecure, over-analyzing boy-crazy me.

It isn’t an accurate representation of me as a person. If it was I would probably be a lot more experienced in the guy-department. To be honest dating doesn’t take up a lot of space in my life. On the list of priorities in my life, a boyfriend is probably not even in the top 5. Sure, it seems like a nice thing to have. I mean, there must be a reason why virtually everything in pop culture circles around it, and to be fair it is our biological purpose in life to procreate, and that requires a mating partner, but mostly I feel like I can do without it.

One of my best friends once asked me if I would rather give up men or meat, an I chose men. That is a horrible choice, because I’m pretty sure in the long haul, I could live without meat, but to quote John Steinbeck:

“A guy needs somebody - to be near him. A guy goes nuts if he ain’t got nobody. Don’t make no difference who the guy is, long’s he’s with you. I tell ya, I tell ya a guy gets too lonely an’ he gets sick.” (change guy to girl of course).

I occasionally feel that loneliness. It comes and goes in waves, to quote Greg Laswell (I am apparently incapable of writing original sentences at the moment, but I guess that’s what books, and movies and music are for: representing our feelings and experiences). Lately I’ve been feeling the loneliness, but mostly I’ve been lamenting my decision to let the guy go. You know, the guy I dated last november/december. The only guy I feel has been worth my time.

There were times when I was dating him, when I was willing to give up pretty much everything for him, and it hurt me, when he didn’t seem to feel the same way. Eventually I realized that that was a lot of weight to put on such an early relationship, but in all fairness, I have nothing to compare it to, and he did sometimes put me first, and it felt great. The downside was that I felt horrible when I wasn’t put first. I resented that feeling, because I’ve always figured that I would be one of those independent girls, who didn’t need to be one half of a whole in a relationship, but someone who saw the relationship as a partnership, instead of a merger. I thought I would be the girl, who urges her boyfriend to go out with his mates, not the girl who waits impatiently at the phone, when he doesn’t answer right away. I turned down offers from other guys, because I felt that giving my number to another guy, would be cheating. But obviously there is no cheating, when there is no agreement of exclusivity. And we never got to that.

Sometimes I cringe, when I think back on how silly I was during those two months. Then I wonder how much I would do different now. Is the waiting by the phone, and time spent making mix tapes part of any new relationship, or just my twisted idea of how relationships work? Maybe I spent so much time on him, because it was all new to me and I was excited about it finally happening, and I didn’t want to fuck it up, or maybe I was genuinely infatuated and he deserved my time. After all, when it is right, the guy should at least be in the top 5 priority list.

Contrasts

Sun, 13 May 2012 17:26:51 +0200

I was at a party last night, and a dude was hitting on me pretty heavily, in a blatant, very non-charming way. The last guy I dated once made out with his friend, because they met a homophobe. This dude is scared of showering with gay guys!

Sigh! I miss him so much these days..

It’s time to watch Titanic (Taken with instagram)

Sun, 15 Apr 2012 18:45:21 +0200

It’s time to watch Titanic (Taken with instagram)

Wednesday playlist (Let’s get happy): Doing the Unstuck -...

Wed, 11 Apr 2012 23:54:09 +0200

Wednesday playlist (Let’s get happy):

Doing the Unstuck - The Cure
Fake Palindromes - Andrew Bird
Death to Los Campesinos! - Los Campesinos!
Animal - Neon Trees
The Fear - Ben Howard
In The Aeroplane over the Sea - Neutral Milk Hotel
There is a Light that never goes out - The Smiths
Mr. Fox in the Fields - Alexandre Desplat
Junk of the Heart (Happy) - The Kooks
I’m not gonna teach your Boyfriend how to dance with you - Black Kids
No Excuses - Aunt Martha

Cappuccino at my favorite café (Taken with instagram)

Sun, 25 Mar 2012 13:54:54 +0200

Cappuccino at my favorite café (Taken with instagram)

Free ice cream + sunshine = a great Sunday (Taken with...

Sun, 25 Mar 2012 13:37:12 +0200

Free ice cream + sunshine = a great Sunday (Taken with instagram)

tinyconversations: Wore it Deep- The Tree Ring The Tree Ring...

Tue, 06 Mar 2012 21:36:18 +0100

tinyconversations:

Wore it Deep- The Tree Ring

The Tree Ring held a private show in someone’s attic. The cover charge was a single household lamp.

My Oscar night (Taken with instagram)

Sun, 26 Feb 2012 23:44:21 +0100

My Oscar night (Taken with instagram)

Watching Game of Thrones on the new common room flat screen...

Fri, 17 Feb 2012 23:57:08 +0100

Watching Game of Thrones on the new common room flat screen (Taken with instagram)

Sometimes it feels like I’m living in a cheesy romcom, except I haven’t gotten to the...

Thu, 16 Feb 2012 20:46:00 +0100

Sometimes it feels like I’m living in a cheesy romcom, except I haven’t gotten to the end where I find the man of my dreams (and he may or may not have been under my nose the entire time).

But seriously: When I started uni last year I had a crush on a guy in my class, let’s call him Will, because they’re always called Will, aren’t they? We had some cute moments, but nothing ever happened. One night at a party he made out with a girl in our class. She is the ‘popular girl’, who everybody secretly hates. Nothing ever came of them, and I kept hearing rumors about Will ‘skanking’ with random girls - which I found hard to believe, because he’s kind of awkward. Well, now he’s sneaking around with a girl from my study group - the girl who is the closest thing I have to a best friend around here. The thing is that about a month before Will and my friend started hooking up, another guy from our class told me, that Will can’t stand her. I wondered for a long time what to make of that, and if this was really a rom com I’d probably tell her and there would be fighting and tears and sad music. I’m sure it was just a misunderstanding and fortunately for everyone I am completely over him. If they really do like each other, I’m very happy for them.

Now all I need is a make-over and a montage of my getting my life together and the one can show up, hopefully in the form of the Matthew Gray Gubler clone I spotted at the university library. I will also accept the real Matthew.

Side-note: Is it just me or are there way too few university-bases romcoms? Please, let me relate to someone other than high schoolers and workaholic singletons.

A rare creative moment for me, while studying. They called a...

Thu, 16 Feb 2012 14:39:42 +0100

A rare creative moment for me, while studying. They called a benign hegemon a unicorn, so… (Taken with instagram)

Accidentally made a heart with my skin tonic. Happy...

Tue, 14 Feb 2012 23:52:23 +0100

Accidentally made a heart with my skin tonic. Happy Valentine’s Day everybody! (Taken with instagram)

lifeisadoubleedgedsword: selcandy

Mon, 13 Feb 2012 08:00:06 +0100

lifeisadoubleedgedsword:

selcandy

You know what I want? I want to have a crush. I want to meet a guy, who is so breathtaking in every...

Sun, 12 Feb 2012 23:58:00 +0100

You know what I want?

I want to have a crush. I want to meet a guy, who is so breathtaking in every aspect of his person, that I get all fluttery and stuttery. It’s been so long since I had a proper crush. I don’t even care if I get to date him or anything. I just want to know that there are men out there, who can make me feel like that, because apart from all the pain of the inevitable one-sidedness of a crush, it’s one of the best feelings in the world.

I’d rather have a painful unrequited love for someone than this numbness towards guys I feel right now.

Looking back I have met very few guys lately, who aren’t annoying on some kind of level. This of course all comes back to me being awfully picky (or to put it nicely: have high standards), but come on! What does it matter that there are plenty of fish in the sea if they’re all blobfish?

Hot cocoa, Gorilla vs. Bear January mix and comparative method....

Mon, 06 Feb 2012 15:22:20 +0100

Hot cocoa, Gorilla vs. Bear January mix and comparative method. Happy Monday! (Taken with instagram)

Cupcake from Harrods :D (Taken with instagram)

Wed, 25 Jan 2012 13:39:22 +0100

Cupcake from Harrods :D (Taken with instagram)

I’m going to London in nine days! Can you tell I’m...

Fri, 13 Jan 2012 20:16:21 +0100

I’m going to London in nine days! Can you tell I’m excited? (Taken with instagram)

Attempting to study (Taken with instagram)

Thu, 12 Jan 2012 15:27:18 +0100

Attempting to study (Taken with instagram)

How to spend a Saturday evening: nuggets, fries, burger and a...

Sat, 07 Jan 2012 19:17:44 +0100

How to spend a Saturday evening: nuggets, fries, burger and a movie (Taken with instagram)